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Tuesday, October 11, 2016

FireRed Jacklocke Part 19

Have you ever entered a random building looking for a bathroom and suddenly found yourself trying to stop a terrorist attack? Because that is exactly what happened to me. I simply walked in through the front door and was immediately up to my ears in menacing musical scores, a phenomenon I like to call “the Presence of Bad Guys Effect”. And the presence of the Presence of Bad Guys Effect can only mean one thing: the presence of bad guys.


Throwing caution to the wind like a woolen sweater on a hot day, I marched up the stairs, ordered Leviathan to Dragon Rage any Evanescence fan he could find, and complained loudly and repeatedly about the questionable architectural choices in the design of this building. Why did they add teleporters to a building with an elevator? More importantly, why did they add unlabeled teleporters to a building with an elevator? I probably spent over an hour getting my atoms disassembled and then reassembled on the wrong floor.

"Wrong place."

"Dang it."

"Crap."

"Son of a..."

Also, I am now missing my pinky toe.

Eventually, though, I managed to warp my way in the right direction only to see things go from bad to worse.


“What kept you, Jack?”

“About thirty Evanescence fans, why do you ask?”

“Hahaha! I thought you’d turn up if I waited here!”

“You are aware that there’s like a terrorist attack going on right now, right?”

“I guess Team Rocket slowed you down! Not that I care!”

“There are, like, hostages and stuff.”

“I saw you in Saffron, so I decided to see if you got better!”

“Then why didn’t you just approach me in Saffron?”

I can’t really say I’m surprised though. Logic has never been Buttock’s strong suit, hence why he chose to lead with a Flying-type Pokemon for the fourth battle in a row. Minato took care of his Pidgeot, Gyarados, and Exeggcute, but was looking a bit worse for wear by the time Buttock threw out his Alakazam. I swapped out for Wumbo, whom I figured would be a hard counter to Buttock’s Meowth-murderer, and I was right. Buttock withdrew his flattened and fainted Alakazem and sent out the Pokemon I’d been waiting for: Charizard. Wumbo withstood a Flamethrower to the face and managed to hold on to 2/3 of his HP, and even after the fainted Alakazam’s Future Sight hit, Wumbo still stood tall at ½ health. Wumbo knocked the Charizard down to 1 hit point after a critical Body Slam.

And then Wumbo was dead. That’s it, just dead. Buttock’s Charizard hit it with a Flamethrower that somehow managed to take away half of Wumbo’s health, when before it could barely manage 1/3. It wasn’t even a critical.



I stood there with a blank face and an empty mind while Hachiko finished off his Charizard. I don’t even remember giving any orders.

“Oh man! So, you are ready for Boss Rock-”

“Shut up.”

And I just walked away. It took all six of us to carry Wumbo’s lifeless body back to the Pokemon Center. There I performed the ritual of releasing my Pokemon’s spirit for the third time. It had been so long since I had last done the ceremony but I still remembered every word.

“Bill’s PC. Move Pokemon. Release. Yes.”


I cried. All of us cried, actually. Even Bacchus, who had seen more friends fall in battle than any of them. In all honesty, I thought that Wumbo was going to make it to the end. Ever since that hard-fought battle with Craig to catch him, I believed that it was somehow destined that Wumbo and I make it to the top together. But, like many times already, I was very wrong.

“Goodbye, my friend.”

“Saur.”

“Golem.”

“Nine.”

“Jolt.”

“Graaaaar.”

And with those final words to our dear friend, we left the Pokemon Center behind.

To be continued…



Read the rest of ActionJ4ck's Jacklocke challenge here.

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